Being a friend

Yesterday, a friend of mine was having a rough time and she called me to have coffee so she could vent. While, this seems like a small matter, for me it's huge. 

The past year has been full of many changes, including learning to be a friend. Before this past year, I only knew how to take and take and take and suck the life out of my friends. I felt that I owned my friends (not in a Single White Female way) and I was very intense about them. I now like to refer to them as my "hostages" because I was a tornado ripping through people's lives and causing drama and draining them emotionally. After so much of that, of course my friends eventually couldn't handle me anymore and moved on with their lives. 

But, I've changed. So much, in fact, that people now call and ask for advice and want to talk things out with me. I used to be the one talking things out constantly, never shutting up to listen to what anyone else was going through. And, if I'm being honest, not caring.

I think I've said it before, but the amazing life I've created for myself in the past year is what I've always wanted. It took much heartache and a lot of growing pains to get to this point, but I couldn't be more thankful of where I am right now. I've always, always wanted to have an abundance of good girls friends, genuine relationships and now I have it. I didn't have to suck the life out of people and be an emotional vampire to get it, either. I had to shut my mouth and open my ears. To have good friends, I learned to be a good friend. And I really couldn't be happier (unless I get a job, of course).