Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Goodbye, New York

Chihuahuapolooza. Enough said. 
When I moved to New York a year and a half ago, it was the hardest and scariest thing I've ever done. I had a couple of friends spread out across the boroughs, but not close enough to where I lived to see on a regular basis.

It was very lonely and hard at first. I cried a lot and was alone a lot. I'd never lived so far from home and so far from what was familiar. New York is pretty much a different country from Atlanta, I couldn't understand what people were saying half the time for the first few months. People are much more abrasive here and that was quite a difficult adjustment for me.

All of this being said, I now have a full life in New York. I have wonderful friends I plan on keeping for life. Bonding with people here is a different experience than anywhere else. New York City is so hard, sometimes all you can do is laugh or cry with a good friend (or a stranger). I'm sad to leave all of my lovely friends. I'm sad to leave my amazing job and awesome coworkers.

I'm leaving for all of the reasons this article states (which is satire, but pretty damn close to the truth). While I'll miss the city a little, I'll mainly miss the people I met from all walks of life, here to follow their dreams. I'll miss the constant challenge (this will be more of a conceptual missing). I found myself here, a little. I am coming in to my own as a fine artist and I couldn't have done that without this experience.

Good-bye, New York!

Thursday, January 8, 2015

Life List: 2015

I’ve been working on this list for several years. It’s nice to go through it in January each year and see what I’ve accomplished. 2014 was awesome and weird and hard. Moving not only to a new city, but to a completely new part of the country where the culture is completely different was amazing. I’ve been in New York for a year and a half now and I’m moving back to Atlanta in a couple of weeks. With the impending wedding and marriage, I’d like to have a savings account. I can’t afford that here. I’m sad and excited for the future. It’s a little heartbreaking to leave the life I built for myself here. I’ve never had to built my life from scratch before, it’s been a lesson of a lifetime. I’ll forever cherish the friendships I’ve made while in New York. 

At this time last year, I made a promise to myself to do some huge art project based off the life list. I made two pieces, hated them and threw them away. However, instead of giving up on it entirely, I painted, sketched and reached out to other artists all year long. I’ve grown so much as an artist in the past 12 months. Now I have an artistic drive and focus I didn’t have before this year. I’m excited to see what comes.

Here it is! Newly abridged:

100 Things To Do Before I Die

  1. Graduate from graduate school
  2. Get a job I don't hate
  3. Procreate
  4. Marry (Soooooon)
  5. Travel to Russia
  6. Travel to Greece
  7. Live in England
  8. Live in New York
  9. Go to a family reunion 
  10. Appreciate myself
  11. Get in really great shape
  12. Hot air balloon ride
  13. Go to the Grand Canyon
  14. Visit San Fransisco
  15. Visit Portland
  16. Visit Seattle
  17. Visit Vancouver
  18. Spend a winter up north 
  19. Have a Roylls
  20. Love thyself
  21. Humble thyself
  22. Let go
  23. Act in a play
  24. Sing in a band
  25. Learn the guitar
  26. Learn the violin
  27. Metalsmithing
  28. Become a Master Knitter (it's a real thing) 
  29. Publish a novel
  30. See aurora borealis
  31. Move out of Atlanta for at least a year
  32. Speak another language fluently
  33. Get an MFA in creative writing
  34. Get paid to sing
  35. Get paid to write (something that I want to write)
  36. Stop smoking 
  37. Accept Average
  38. Be a graphic designer
  39. Let go more quickly
  40. Learn to sew (I have a sewing machine and I’m working on it)
  41. Visit Stonehenge 
  42. Camp out in the haunted graveyard where the Bell Witch haunted
  43. Go to the monastery in Conyers
  44. Go on a cruise
  45. See Machu Picchu 
  46. Use that geocache app and geocache some stuffs
  47. Own a Chanel purse
  48. Take my grandmother's life writings and convert them into one cohesive tale
  49. Know embroidery
  50. Get rid of stuff
  51. Become proficient in HTML and CSS
  52. Host and effectively design my own blog
  53. Do stand up comedy
  54. Become flexible (physically)
  55. Master (is this possible?) meditation
  56. Visit India
  57. Visit Norway
  58. Visit Japan
  59. Go to the Metropolitan Museum
  60. Stop feeling victimized by the past
  61. Get 10 years
  62. Finish my cross stitch
  63. Become a full time artist
  64. Set up boundaries

Sunday, November 16, 2014

Bright Lights and French Fries

There was a New York City fry exhibit last weekend. Honestly, I skimmed the first paragraph, looked at the pictures and put the address into my phone. I saw that you couldn’t eat the fries that were being exhibited, but I didn’t really think you wouldn’t be able to eat there. I mean, it was an exhibit about food. Of course there was going to be food. 

There wasn’t any food.

It was literally just fries under glass with wire stuck through them, straight up, like fingers. Fries aren’t that interesting to look at. Sure, some have more pepper than others, some are fat, some are skinny, long, short, ect. But, you’ve seen 5 fries, you’ve seen them all. And that’s how this exhibit was. The Romanian (friend I went with) and I were not very happy we trekked all the way down to Nolita in the cold to walk around french fries for 10 minutes. I don’t feel more cultured at all. I didn’t benefit from seeing the fries in any way. Other than the Romanian and I rolling our eyes at each other and laughing about how New York this whole thing was. Did I mention there wasn’t any food?!! 

Next, we headed over to the DUMBO Festival of Lights. When we got off the train, we pushed through hoards of people toward the Manhattan Bridge–where these spectacular lights were supposed to be taking place. When I say hoards, I mean hoards. Like the L train during rush hour amount of people as far as the eye can see. The Romanian and I held hands so we didn’t lose one another. But, unfortunately, the police shut down everything because there were too many people. 

I don't even understand how it is possible to hold a free event on a Saturday in Brooklyn, New York and not plan for 10,000s of people. We didn't get to see anything. The Romanian and I did go to Dewey's Candy on Front Street. I've been trying to go there since before I tried to move here. Every time I'm in DUMBO, it's closed. 

We are planning to reconvene at the MET to see the Cubism event soon. You can't eat paintings and I doubt there will be too many people for them to show the exhibit. 

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Speaking While Female

I watched this through Buzzfeed and think it's very interesting. If you haven't watched it, watch it. It's eye opening that these snap judgements are biological. It's made me think, and not in a good way. Like, if we're programmed to automatically not trust a higher voice (women), what does that actually mean? I'd love your thoughts.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

One of these things does not equal the other

Since I got engaged, it's been interesting to see how many of my friends struggle to be happy for me because they are so jealous. I know, I know that sounds terrible, but I they aren't jealous of me, it's the happily ever after that we've been sold since we came out of the womb. And by we, I mean women.

Watching my friends trying to be happy for me while also panicking that they are never, ever going to get married or find the one (I know this is happening because they've told me and I had a hard time being happy for my engaged friends when I was the one freaking out about never finding the one) is weird. Having been on their side of this not too long ago makes me laugh at my former self. It really is as if I viewed marriage and engagement as a prize, and I see my friends viewing it the same way. We all seem to think that once we get engaged or married, life can begin. I've had more than one friend tell me, lately, her ovaries are dying and she needs the meet Mr. Right immediately so she can start popping out babies before she is in her mid–30's. I internally laughed because I've literally cried to Derp about the exact same thing.

Why do we feel such pressure to pair up? Is it instinct? Is it society? I feel like it's both. However, it is so silly that, as women, we feel like our lives aren't going to take off until we are married do boys feel this awy too?). As Boyfriend and I are planning the wedding (let's be honest, it's me and my mom), I see our lives are coming together–not beginning. We are going to struggle with the same every day issues we struggle with now, except we will struggle with them together. We will still be who we are today the day after the wedding.